funny 11 quotes

Everyone has a friend that always claims they’ll be there about seven but never shows up until nine o’clock.

When it is time for me to get out of bed in the morning, my bed is always especially cozy.
I detest those who take my ideas before I have a chance to formulate them.
I cover my six-pack with fat because I adore it so much.
One can never purchase love. You still have to pay for it, though.
On Mondays, anybody says “Good Morning” ought to be smacked.
Come late and begin sleeping, L.A.S.S.
Unless you are obese, running away does not solve your problems.
Don’t worry if time does not wait for you. Simply take the clock’s battery out and go enjoy life.
Try not to touch your lips while pronouncing the letter M.
Given how widespread common sense is, why is it so prevalent?

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